Dude. Can you feel the excitement? This Sunday, folks everywhere are polishing their wide-screen TVs for one of the most exciting events in television all year.
That's right, I'm talking about Puppy Bowl.
Of course, I know not everyone is as much of a sports enthusiast as I am, so perhaps instead you'll be tuning into some lesser event. I'm sure there's bound to be something on. Whatever you are watching, though, you might as well make an event of it. You know, have a few buds over, bust out the chips, dress for the occasion, enjoy a little quality bro time.
Whoa, those guys are really crazy for puppies.
Anyhow, I may not know much about sports, but I do know any televised event that contains the word "Bowl" requires copious amounts of hardy, gut-building man chow.
Wait, what? You were expecting us to conjure up some fancy new thing to serve this Sunday? Look, we have cooked our fingers to the bone for the last four years. I'm serving leftovers from the archive. Hey, they're still good. Maybe a little freezer burn here and there. You'll eat what you're given. Children are starving in Haiti. Finish your plate.